That day I was nagging to my dearest friend, we were talking about life, age, change, EXs and such a losers subjects. Anyway, I popped her with a mysterious question “what is it with EXs, why we always feel we are missing them, given the fact that our life wasn’t really any better with them”
After few silent moments she said “we don’t miss the EX, we miss ourselves back there”
All I know after that was a BOMMMM
Her idea was revolutionary! To understand the idea we have to recognise three identities:
2-Me in the past
3-every thing associated with me in the past (2), being a subject or a person
if you’re now (1) in your mid 30s, married with 2 kids and driving a Volvo and you think that your life now sucks and miserable, you are missing your girlfriend (3)when you were 25 and missing your jeep wrangler (3) in those days. What is really going on is that you are missing your self when you were 25 (2) you’re not really dieing to go back and drive the wrangler (3) or have fun with the girlfriend (3).
Now, what’s useful about this idea and why am so passionate about it?
Well, I have heard a lot of people talking about their Exs and how their life worth nothing with out him/ her and how they will do anything to get them back and bla bla bla. Also we’ve seen a lot of talk shows trying to solve the issue and what should we do about the subject with a lot of tears and kleenex.
I guess our revolutionary idea is the solution to this feeling, you are missing your Ex not because she/he was good and your life was fine with them, you are only missing your self in the past and missing every thing in it, be it your BMX bike when you were 7, your superman pajamas when you were 17(loll my mom tried to boost my self esteem, too late though), your car when you were 21 and your girlfriend or ex wife when you were 27 or so!
No more I cant live with out him
No more my life worth nothing with out her
No more kleenex
I love the idea , or it might be just me trying to make my self feel better about my self NOW (1)
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You are correct. The both assumptions are right, but it differ with different people.
Some people wouldn't miss the Ex as much as they miss themselves in the past, but they refer to the back by a definite person as it more realistic to the life (it would be simpler than relating that period with other thing), so they assume if things worked in the right way at that time they would still be who they were around that time. (I know that sounds complicated, but think of it in psychological way, it will make sense)
However, other people truly miss their Ex's, so they tend to wish if things worked out, because they were attached to each other, and things might be different if they continued with each other (with the exclusion of the fact that these things no one know in certain what might happen if things went in the different direction except Allah) but believe me Love can control and affect the person and make them different in so many ways.
love makes wonders :P
Again, I agree with your revolutionary thought and agree with the last bit of your post too.
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